Revising and Editing #1

(4) “Your cousin Juan will be there‚ and you used to play basketball for hours with them,” I persuasively replied.

What change should be made in sentence 4?

• Delete the quotation marks before 'Your'

• Change 'used to play' to 'are playing'

• Insert a comma after basketball

• Change them to him

Tags

CCSS.L.3.2C

CCSS.L.4.2B

CCSS.L.5.2D

(2) Marta grumbled‚ “Dad‚ its been a decade since we’ve seen these people.”

What change should be made in sentence 2?

• Delete the comma after Dad

• Change its to it’s

• Change since to between

• Change these to them

Tags

CCSS.L.2.2C

(18) In martial arts, they become better at self-discipline the longer people train.

What is the MOST effective way to revise sentence 18 to make the meaning more clear?

• The people that become better at self-discipline, they train in martial arts longer.

• The people that train in martial arts become better at self-discipline longer.

• The longer people train, they become better at self-discipline in martial arts.

• The longer people train in martial arts, the better they become at self-discipline.

Tags

CCSS.L.3.1G

(27) Learning to master martial arts takes effort and dedication, but the benefits are large.

Rose would like to use a more precise word than 'large' in sentence 27. Which word would be a more effective word to use in this sentence?

• heavy

• countless

• limited

• grand

Tags

CCSS.L.1.1F

CCSS.L.2.1E

(6) I know from experience that studying martial arts can help you improve your physical fitness. (7) I began taking karate at age seven when my parents insisted I get off the couch and “do something.” (8) At first it was difficult for me to complete the kicking, punching, and blocking drills in karate. (9) I practiced every week to get my heart pumping and at striking foam pads with my hands to help improve my technique. (10) My dedication paid off, and I eventually worked my way up to the rank of brown belt. (11) I love feeling healthier and knowing that I can defend myself if necessary.

Rose wants to add another detail to help support the ideas in the second paragraph (sentences 6–11). Which sentence should replace sentence 10 to accomplish this goal?

• There were very few kids my age who attend karate daily.

• My parents were happy that I made so many friends in karate class.

• I did not realize kids my age could earn such high ranks in a martial-arts class.

• I have become stronger, faster, and better coordinated than I was when I first started.

Tags

CCSS.RI.6.5

CCSS.RI.7.3

CCSS.RI.7.5

CCSS.RI.8.3

CCSS.RI.8.5